ON PEACHES GELDOF

I think that most people would be lying if they said that they weren't surprised when Peaches died.

A far cry from the girl she once was, Peaches had blossomed into a young woman, a young mother who used her voice to promote a natural way or parenting. Who loves and doted on her family and spoke gently of her past.

Currently we're still waiting for the inquest findings to be made public, but that hasn't stopped the media, and sadly much of my Facebook feed condemn the selfish mother who died of a heroin overdose like her mother.

Now, whether or not drugs were the cause of Peaches' tragic passing has become mostly irrelevant to me. Whatever the cause her death is no less tragic. The cause of her death does not take away the pain her friends and family are experiencing and it does not take away what she gave to the voice of natural parenting and especially young mothers.

However, what has become alarmingly apparent to me is just how much judgement people face. And not just those who are struggling with addiction. Those who struggle with mental health issues, their families and friends and those who support them. 

Today rather than question why a young woman, a doting mother who seemingly had everything would possibly be so desperate she would turn to drugs people have branded her selfish and a bad parent.

Instead of trying to understand the reasons people have taken the tragic outcome and spewed hate all over the internet.

So few people have spoken kind words, although that may be because those people don't feel the need to take their opinion to the internet as those who take a more negative view do.

In my opinion, if Peaches was struggling with substance abuse we should learn from her not condemn her. We should wonder why such a passionate young woman wouldn't seek help and rather struggle alone. Consider why anyone at all would struggle in secret. Although I feel I know the answer to that already.

Fear.

Fear of judgement, fear of more guilt being piled on top of your already crippling guilt. Fear that maybe your children will be taken away. Fear that you may not be a fit mother.

Fear is far less crippling than an addiction to an addict.

Fear is far less crippling then starvation to an anorexic.

We should look at the situation as it currently stands with the judgement and stigma and hate and realise that this behaviour is exactly what breeds fear. It is exactly what stops people from reaching out for the help they need. It is exactly what keeps people indoors spiralling out of control until one day death interviens and then we can all pass judgement on how selfish that person was.

We should remember Peaches as the inspirational young parent she was, who admitted her mistakes and spoke openly about how difficult things could be but also of how beautiful life was with two young sons who she adored.